My Statement of Accountability
Author’s Note:
In recent weeks, I’ve written about spiritual abuse, institutional silence, and the cost of concealing misconduct in faith-based communities. Before continuing that conversation, I want to pause and offer something else: my own accountability.
This is not a defense or a justification. It’s not an attempt to center myself or to excuse anything that happened. It is simply what I believe every one of us, especially those who speak out, should be willing to do: name what we’ve done, take responsibility for it, and walk forward in the light.
You can read my statement below.
My Statement of Accountability
1. Naming What I Take Responsibility For
I want to speak clearly about what I take responsibility for.
In October 2022, I entered into a six-month emotional and physical affair with Erik Herrmann, a married man, a seminary professor, and a pastor. I knew the relationship was sinful and crossed boundaries. While I now understand more about the imbalance of power and the dynamics of spiritual manipulation, I also know this: I chose to participate in something that caused deep harm to others. I take responsibility for that choice.
I grieve what it cost my own husband and family, Erik’s wife and children, and the seminary community that trusted him. My actions contributed to that harm, and I have carried the weight of that truth ever since.
2. What I’m Naming Today
Telling the truth about what happened is not an attempt to justify the relationship or to seek sympathy. It is also not an attempt to continue the harm. In fact, it is the opposite.
My public writing is not an extension of the affair—it is a response to the silence that followed it. I am not writing to harm Erik’s family, his students, or his community. I am writing because the harm has already occurred, and the silence surrounding it has protected the wrong people. I believe truth-telling is the beginning of repair—and that the institutional structures that allowed this to remain hidden must be confronted for the sake of others who deserve clarity, protection, and honesty.
3. A Commitment to Moral Clarity
I do not claim to have handled everything perfectly. I have made painful mistakes and learned from them. What I claim now is responsibility for what I chose, for what I’ve learned, and for what I will no longer remain silent about.
I have repented before the Lord and asked forgiveness from those closest to me. I believe that forgiveness comes not through the declaration of any individual, but through Christ alone. This is not a request for sympathy or absolution. It is a statement of accountability for my part in what happened, and for my decision to pursue truth, clarity, and integrity as the way forward.